It’s Not a Myth, It’s a Gift!

There is a truth that has been scientifically proven for generations that children raised in a two-parent household enjoy better lives. In today’s world, there are those who are trying to show that this truth is a myth. In reality, it is not a myth, but a gift. If you want to change the world, if you want to alter lives, if you want to make a difference, raise children within a marriage.

The truth speaks for itself when it is not twisted.

As I was doing the research for this article, I was amazed at how hard they are working to twist the facts. It sounds like they are speaking truth and citing proven numbers. However, they are selecting numbers and then combining them with carefully chosen words. For example, one article cites evidence that black children in two-parent homes will still fare worse economically than white children in two-parent homes. This is a fact, but they are using it to “prove” that a two-parent home doesn’t increase the outcome potential for children. Kevin DeYoung states that,

We can lament that black children in two-parent families are still 2.4 times more likely to be in poverty than white children (12% v. 5%), but we should also observe that white children raised by only a mother are 2.6 times as likely to be in poverty as black children raised by two parents (31% v. 12%). While there are still advantages to being white in this country, the much bigger advantage is being raised by two parents. It is better in America to be a black child raised by two parents than to be a white child in a one-parent home. The breakdown of the family is not a black problem; it is a problem wherever two-parent families decline and single-parent households become normalized.

The Power of the Two-Parent Home | Kevin DeYoung
Two parents increase the odds of a child’s success in life.

Wow, let’s read that line again, “It is better in America to be a black child raised by two parents than to be a white child in a one-parent home.” It’s a gift to your child to raise them with two parents. You are increasing their odds of success in life! The gift doesn’t end there. You are also giving society a gift.

Children raised with two parents are a gift to society.

Two-parent households and the children in them are less dependent on welfare. They have higher earnings and increased employment rates. Their households are more involved in community activities such as politics and service. They also enjoy better health. The children they raise are also a gift to society.

Children raised in two-parent homes are a gift to everyone.

One of the best and most concise summaries of the academic literature comes from a policy brief published in 2003 by the Center for Law and Social Policy.[6] Citing a 1994 study by Sara McLanahan and Gary Sandefur, the 2003 brief notes that children who do not live with both biological parents were roughly twice as likely to be poor, to have birth outside of marriage, to have behavioral and psychological problems, and to not graduate from high school.[7] Another study found that children in single-parent homes were more likely to experience health problems, such as accidents, injuries, and poisonings.[8] Other research found that children living with single mothers were five times as likely to be poor. The Power of the Two-Parent Home | Kevin DeYoung

Marriage is a weapon against the ills of society.

Marriage is one of the greatest weapons against poverty, behavioral and psychological problems, ill health, and inadequate education. That is quite the gift to give a child, society, and the world! After reading this you may start thinking that anyone who gets divorced is doing everyone a disservice. That you should stay together no matter what. Marriage isn’t what changes things; it is what provides the stability and additional resources that give children the edge. If your marriage is “high conflict” you are undoing the pluses. Studies have shown that,

Despite the overwhelming benefits of two parent homes, the ‘stay together for the kids’ axiom isn’t always the right one.  In fact, children are not always better off if their parents are married and living in the same home – especially if their parents are in a high conflict relationship. High conflict relationships can have disastrous effects on children, especially in children’s attitudes and feelings about themselves (something that studies have shown not to be affected by living arrangement).  Staying in an irretrievably broken marriage isn’t healthy for anyone, the parents or the children. However, if a marriage is fixable, weighing the benefits for children may make married parents think long and hard about starting over.  At the same time, unmarried parents are not all that different from married ones in terms of behavior. Marriage doesn’t make anyone a better parent, it simply allows access to more resources and opportunities for children overall.

40 Facts About Two Parent Families | Studies and Statistics (gillespieshields.com)

All things need to be given their proper value. No one is benefiting from an abusive relationship. Everyone benefits from those who are willing to change themselves into better people. Give the gift of hope for the future to everyone by seeking help. Great changes are made because of little ones. If you’re having a bad day, we’re happy to help out. Maybe money is tight and you need a little help with school supplies or a babysitter, stop by. If you need counseling, we can guide you. Or perhaps you’re looking for an opportunity to help others, we welcome your help! We can always use volunteers or donations to enable us to continue to be there for everyone. We look forward to being a part of your life, or even just your day.

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